Warnock, ringworm, chickenpox- all get under the skin, all very infectious.

In case you hadn’t heard, Neil Warnock returns to Selhurst Park tomorrow.

From the moment the QPR team bus rolls up to the moment that it leaves the ground, Neil Warnock will be the centerpiece of tomorrow’s family lunch. Agree or disagree, try as you might to not make it so, we just can’t fight it- there is no ignoring Neil Warnock… that’s why he’s Neil Warnock.

Whether it’s from the Blades, the Owls, the Eagles or the fruitbowl- the man loves attention. Some may suggest it’s for his ego to suckle on, but the smarter guys in the room will know that this is far from the truth.

When it comes to mind games, Neil could hold his own with Wenger and Fergie (he puts Benitez to utter shame!)

All his ranting and raving on and off the touchline is designed to take any pressured attention away from his players, and onto himself. And it works.

Neil Warnock builds teams based on confidence, work ethic and team spirit. It may take a little while to do but much like a fresh on the scene stepfather, Warnock busts a gut trying to win over his adopted charges. And when he does, it works.

A good performance will bring praise no matter the result. A bad performance will bring an equally passionate, less praise-based response. If Neil’s disappointed, he’ll be sure to let you hear it- but here’s the trick, he’ll only let you hear it directly from him, and never in the public domain. Should that frustration manifest itself as a bit of referee bashing, so be it. Why publicly humiliate your dressing room when you can give it to the (often-inept) men in black instead?

Neil Warnock doesn’t use a carrot and a stick… he’s somehow managed to combine the two into a big, orange, carrot-flavoured stick. Confusing? Sometimes. Frustrating? Often! Effective? Definitely…

For Neil Warnock, a player’s passion, attitude and work ethic comes first. If a player can show that they want it, then they’ll be given a chance to go out and get it. It’s only then that their abiity with a football comes into the equation.

Two polarizing examples: Clinton Morrison and Alan Lee.

Clinton’s one of our all time top scorers and a hero amongst many. However, he’s never been someone to burst his lungs chasing the ball and putting defenders under pressure. Always likely to grab you a goal, but his sleeves were very much rolled down.

So when it came to his contract expiring, was it any surprise that Warnock’s offer came with a very clear “not guaranteed a first team place” clause? Was it anymore surprising that Clinton didn’t sign it?

See also: Stern John, Ashley Paul Robinson, Nick Carle and pre-turnaround Victor Moses

On the other side, there’s Alan Lee. Signed by Warnock for £600k, he arrived out of shape and with a poor attitude. Deservedly sent out on loan, and unsurprisingly back with us when it ended. Yet this season saw him transform. Much fitter, committed to the cause and he now chases after the ball like it’s tugging on his… nose. That didn’t happen overnight and you can only attribute that to the Neil Warnock effect.

See also: Shefki Kuqi, Johnny Ertl and post-turnaround Victor Moses.

You either get on board, or you’re not invited to the party.

This is why I think we’ll overcome a faltering QPR side tomorrow. Not because their squad isn’t capable, not because they’ve got a bad manager, but the two elements haven’t met in the middle yet- it’s not Neil Warnock’s QPR. Let’s hope that consummation happens in the summer (£10million later) and not before 5pm tomorrow.

When he emerges tomorrow if you’re going to abuse him, do it after the final whistle. If you’re going to give him a warm reception, do it after the final whistle- everything before that needs to be focused solely on everybody who has stuck around for the fight in the red ‘n’ blue corner. Not for the mischievous little scamp in the naughty corner.

PTTP

(This blog wasn’t meant to be all about Neil Warnock, but in a weird way, I’ve proved myself right- there’s no avoiding him! That’s why he’s Neil Warnock.)